I imagine this post is more for me than anybody else, due in part to the fact that nobody reads these except the Google spiders. That’s fine. Mainly, I just came to say that after months of making excuses, I’ve started to make a little progress instead. I’ve got my little planner book. I’ve got my little tarot app on my phone. I’m a little more organized and a little more motivated. I’d like Pumpkin Guts to be done and sent off by the end of the month. Maybe it’ll fly, maybe it won’t, but April’s coming fast. Once May hits, it gets damn hard to write stuff. Who knows? Maybe this time I’ll build up some momentum and keep it rolling.

CG Jung said “You are what you do, not what you say you’ll do.” Me, I want to be a writer. Sometimes I am. Here’s hoping I am more than I’m not in the months ahead. Here’s hoping I can climb the mountain and light the Demon Torch of Fuhl Thraga Shaka. Let’s fuggin’ boogie, man!

The Sand Taker – Audio

I am thrilled to inform you that my short story “The Sand Taker” has been recorded in convenient audiobook format, and it is all kinds of ready for YOU to listen to! My pal Jordan Etheredge provided the narration for this one. You may remember her from her brilliant work on the audiobook for my novella Cruce Roosters. She does such a great job, I cannot recommend her enough. I could go on and on, but I’ll just let her speak for herself.

I happily present “The Sand Taker,” by me, narrated by Jordan Etheredge:

This story originally appeared in my short story collection DOOMSDAY FURNACE. Get yourself a copy of Doomsday Furnace by Brent Michael Kelley HERE.

Apex Predator

What’s up, Suckas! I did a painting last year called Apex Predator. The painting hangs at the Groundwork Grappling, the Brazilian Jiu Jitsu academy where I train. I’ve had a number of people ask me where they can get a print, and I’m here today to tell you that there are TWO fancy places where you can do that! Apex Predator is available as a print at and I have also applied the art to a number of products, so if you’d like a wall clock or water bottle or whatever with this painting on it, all of your wildest dreams are about to come true! The best part? If you order prints or whatever of Apex Predator… *I GET MONEY!*

This Apex Predator is highly trained in the art of Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. Up in the mountains, this monstrous beast trains day and night. He’s a snarling, raging creature, and if you confuse him with “Cocaine Bear,” he is likely to become far angrier. ALSO!!! There is an alternate design in the works. A digitized “64-bit” design will be available soon, because I know you love Sega Genesis.

If I can sell a bunch of these, it might just help drive me to make others, so I’d love it if you shared this with someone you know who has similar amazing taste in fine art. YOU ROCK!

Let’s Go, Chums!

Has your hero (me) been pretty lazy for the past… really long time? MAYBE! What’s to be done about that? NOBODY KNOWS! If you’re me (and some of you possibly are), you’ve probably heard a lot of folks asking when the next book is coming out. The answer, of course, is I don’t know. I have a bunch of works in progress, all at different stages of incompletion. I assure you things are happening. Not super fast, but happening.

You may be wondering what YOU can do to help speed things along. How YOU can help manifest a whole cavalcade of new books by your old pal, Brent. You’re about to be shocked to learn there IS a way you can help! Simply, go to my author page on Amazon >> HERE << and leave a review for one of my books. That goes for ANY of your favorite authors. It’s great encouragement, and it tells Amazon to promote the book to more people.

Coming Soon: some YouTube stuff, some podcast stuff, some art stuff, more begging for book reviews, and some other stuff. Stay tuned while I get this site back in order. POWER HUGS!